Author Topic: Adrift in the Kaleidoscope (Brainstorming / Summary / Criticism Thread)  (Read 4456 times)

Andoriol

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Okay, rather than cluttering up other threads with my mess, I'm putting it here for a central location of being torn apart by criticism. I'm eager to hear any thoughts or criticism offered whatsoever!


Table of Contents:
Summary
Things Lost
Universes
Sequence of Events Summary
Notes



General Summary
This fic will be an explicit Self Insert Crossover which I intend to make at very least not suck, but hopefully be awesome. The current concept is the SI is summoned into the Holy Grail War. After getting killed for obvious reasons, the SI finds himself in another, different universe. And after an indeterminate amount of time, finds himself in another before being summoned into the Holy Grail War again. This repeats again and again, each time traveling to more universes, and each time returning to the Holy Grail War to die.

Every time the SI dies, he loses a piece of his memories of who he was, bits and pieces of what makes him, well, him. And early on, he dies a lot. But if he doesn't die in a universe, his soul can 'update', allowing him to actually grow and gain skill... provided he doesn't die.

Core themes will be the examination of Mortality, of Identity, and of the SI having to deal with not knowing wtf is going on.

While the summaries focus on events and abilities gained, the writing itself will focus on the characters and their interactions since they're what really matters in the story, I just have trouble predicting how that's going to turn out from this point as I focus on keeping the characters *In* Character and let their interactions and relationships develop from there.



Things Lost
As a tentative list of the things the SI loses along the way with every death. Not necessarily in order.

  • Name
  • Clear memories of Grandparents
  • Clear Memories of pets
  • Clear memories of old friends
  • Memories of Grandparents
  • Favorite Foods
  • Favorite habits
  • Memories of Pets
  • Clear memories of old homes
  • Clear memories of his old girlfriends
  • Birthdate and related info?
  • Gonna Need More Rope (seriously, I expect this guy to die more than 11 times, I need more significant peices of himself to lose, ideally other than family)



Universes
F/SN
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
Each time he returns as Archer, the Servant of Rin in the Fifth Holy Grail War... and usually dies. He's stronger and smarter and better prepared each time he returns, but still usually gets killed or at very least shunted out of reality without winning due to lack of prana or other factors. The very first time he's here and dies, he loses his name, and out of desperation for something to call himself, defaults to his Class, Archer.
Baldur's Gate
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
Summoned by a wizard protagonist of the series, he sticks with the group until he fades out for one reason or another, helping them on quests and growing in power beside them, growing to become a part of the 'family' that develops amongst the party. He is given the main character's last name to show this, which humbles him beyond words and 'officially' makes him a brother.

In time, he steals the spark of divinity from Saerevok. He sticks close to the protagonist through the entire series, learning both magic and swordsmanship from the various party members.

His knowledge of the first game is limited, but once they get to the second game he greatly increases their effectiveness. Over time, he starts to act as the de-facto leader of the secondary team, sometimes referred to amusingly as ‘team evil’ because he can stand their various crazies and while few of them like him, they all prefer him to any of the others.

He eventually steals the divinity of many of the children of Bhaal they encounter and have to kill. While he mostly learns Arcane magic, he also picks up pointers on how to channel his stolen divine power as if he was a Cleric as well as how druidic magic works.

While he helps them accomplish amazing feats and is the PoV character, he is never the protagonist.
Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
??? Flip-flopping between overwriting the Revan's programmed memory or waking up beside him/her and staying with them as a companion. In the latter case, if he dies, he starts at the beginning again but with a different Revan, so I'm leaning towards that one.
Monster Rancher
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
Summoned by a Mystery Disk into the world in place of the Protagonist? (Or in addition to the normal Protagonist?) While this world is not particularly physically threatening to him, it does weird him out and he doesn’t really fit in.

He guides their group along towards finding the Pheonix to stop Mu, but by the time Mu attacks the first time, Archer has holy weaponry and basically just eats the Evil Spirit. This makes him weaker in sunlight but greatly increases his magical power as well as making him strengthened by “evil”. By the point Mu is added to his soul, it’s already a dark place, so one more voice to a chorus doesn’t make much of a difference, and it always advocates stupid evil or evil for evils sake, it irritates Archer more than anything else.
Rosario + Vampire
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
He wakes up on a bus with all of his equipment in a duffel bag nearby, but in his body from the begining of high school, confused as fuck. This means he's an absolute runt. He vaguely follows the storyline of the manga on complete accident.

This universe is surprisingly threatening to him as despite having both a weaker ability to use the Force and his magic, he cannot wear his armor at school, making him far more vulnerable than he is accustomed to.

Archer recreates the harem on complete accident, his original intent just being to keep the girls safe and train them up to handle Fairy Tail. But he’s a nice guy that isn’t particularly prejudiced who gets very angry when people he cares about are threatened. He is badly wounded several times and injected with vampiric blood, gradually becoming a Vampire (In the Rosario sense), which both forces him to require blood and makes him weak to holy items and pure water, but increases his strength, speed, toughness, and grants limited regeneration.
Familiar of Zero
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
Archer is summoned by Louise. Far more patient and mature than Saito, he helps Louise to grow and develop. He's too old and she reminds him far too much of his little sister for him to have any romantic feelings for her, or hell, any of her classmates.

He’s rather vicious when dealing with enemies. He gains Derf as well as the Gandálfr ‘class’ which increases his dangerousness considerably.

When Siesta is taken by Mott, Archer does not take kindly to it and while they politely get her back before she’s harmed, Archer returns under the guise of a demon to reduce the noble and his home to rubble.

The fact that Archer is willing to kill his enemies very, very dead changes the story in subtle ways.
Dog Days
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
Summoned as a 'hero unit', Archer is fucking embarrassed. Fucking. Embarassed. That said, his relatively immense experience in far more lethal combat than this makes him a wrecking ball to the plot and later on, new rules are considered to make him being there fair.

He's also far more of a cat person damnit! He was summoned by the wrong side!

Regardless, he gains Palladion, a shapeshifting holy weapon that can become a ring, shield, staff, spears, sword, hoverboard and more. It dispels evil, heals good, and channels mana. He mostly spends time practicing his non-lethal combat and pushing himself to his limits when not being lazy.

Seriously, plot, meet wrecking ball.
Dragon Age Origins
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
He appears out of a pool of Lyrium in the Deep Roads, he gets infected by Darkspawn blood and runs into the Dwarven Noble, keeping them both safe. Cue Duncan. Archer is immediately inducted into the Gray Wardens to save his life.

Archer has an unpleasant surprise when he finds that his normal magics don’t really work here and Dragon Age magic is something he can’t do.

They go along and pick up several other ‘protagonist’ Gray Wardens on the way to Ostagar. With a considerably larger group of rookie wardens they make it out, Archer using his jetpack to carry several out of there.

They work their way through the game, Archer is basically useless in the Mage Tower, he can tell his ‘dream’ is a lie, but he can’t get out.

They reclaim the Solidiers Keep and Archer takes the potion, while he argues for keeping Avernus alive with limitations, the others take the question into their own hands and kill him.

While Archer keeps the group and the conflicting personalities from tearing each other apart, he doesn’t have much time to do much else in Denerim, though he’s able to learn some smithing tips from Wade in exchange for some of his own.

They head through the Brecillian forest and Archer is the one to touch the gem with the Arcane Warrior spirit within it… only to absorb the spirit and its knowledge and magic… somehow. How he did it is a mystery to him as he didn’t intend to do that at all. Archer tries to use his outside knowledge to get the leader of the elves to be peaceful, but it doesn’t work and it turns into a fight before they force him to break the curse. The decision is extremely controversial but they work through it as a group.

They get a pinch of dust from the urn of sacred ashes and Archer helps kill a dragon, but isn’t allowed into the temple proper as he is 'unholy'.

The group of Wardens split, one headed to Redcliffe to save the Arl while the other heading to Orzamar. Archer is surprisingly at home in dwarven politics and convinces the Dwarven Noble that Harrowmont is best for the throne. A total dick, but best for the throne. Archer tries to save both of the paragons, but it doesn’t work and he saves neither.

They return to the landsmeet, the other Wardens automatically have Archer fight Loghain as he's the most dangerous of them. Archer refuses to kill Loghain and inducts him into the Gray Wardens. Allistar is pissed despite Archer having talked with him about it beforehand, and while Allistar still maries Alora and takes the throne, he does not join the group any further. They move on the Blight as per normal and (unknown to Archer) one of the other Wardens has had sex with Morrigan to conceive the potential god-child. By this point Archer is ‘evil’ enough in his soul to reasonably believe he could survive absorbing the Archdemons soul if it came to that. One of the Wardens dies in the war and Archer takes the killing blow himself… and the blast of Arch-demon-ness knocks his ass out.
Mass Effect
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
He gets shot from a Mass Relay onto Tuchunka. Have fun~.

More seriously, he struggles some with the lack of magic. He works his way to the Citadel and saves Tali from Saren’s men and meets Shepard immediately afterwards. Archer is seriously disturbed by how ‘on time’ he was and the sheer coincidence involved for such a meeting on a place the size of the Citadel.

He goes with Paragon Shepard. He gets killed in one of the early engagements simply because a bullet goes through his head. ??? He ‘reloads’ on his next iteration into this world right before that fight, something entirely different than what else has happened in worlds which confuses the hell out of him due to the lack of pattern.

On Virmire, Kaiden acts as the liason for the Salarians, but Archer arms the nuke. They start to get overwhelmed, Archer insists they go for Kaiden, they’ll hold as long as necessary. He pulls what little magic he can muster up to waste the enemies long enough for the Normandy to swing by and pick them up (since the bomb is already armed) and they go to pick up Shepard who’s fought off Saren.

Shepard pulls Archer aside and interrogates a full explanation from him which is then explained to the rest of the ground team. Archer consistently talks with the Council in a more reasonable fashion than canon!Shepard does, noting that while he doesn’t know the validity of Shepards whole “The Reapers killed all sentient life!” thing, the fact that Saren is the leader of the Geth who believe he’s going to cause that and possesses a massive, highly advanced ship deserves consideration.

By the end, Archer has changed little other than saving both Ashely and Kaiden, mostly because Shepard is very, very paragon and charismatic. Archer is clipped by a piece of Sovereign when they make their attack.

---

I'm wondering if it might be better to have Archer completely reset with a completely different Shepard every time he dies here?
Kingdoms of Amalur
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
Wakes up in a pile of corpses. Joys. “… I wish I could say that this was weird or horrifying, but this is kind of normal by this point.”

Disconnected from Fate and unable to use magic here because it quite literally fries his circuits when he tries because there’s so much mana in the air. He gathers a small group of allies as he goes along simply to supplement his own skills and loss of abilities.

He goes through the storyline relatively the same, a bit bumbling since he doesn’t remember much of anything about the game, but successful.

He tends to get along with Fae better than he gets along with people by this point, which is very awkward for him. He becomes the King of several houses of Fae almost on accident due to his tendency to help people, rebuilding the House of Ballads because he's unwilling to kill the Winter Queen or the House of Ballads, and they're going to fucking deal with it.

He makes sure to do the ‘fighters guild’ and ‘Mages guild’ quests as he remembers that they have world-ending consequences if not done.
Divinity 2 (Ego Draconis)
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
The first time he arrives in this world, Archer has all of the skill he has worked so hard for scoured from his mind and must struggle to regain it.

He’s not as horrendous as the normal characters would be at that stage as he still has exceedingly powerful equipment by this point, but he still nearly gets killed.

He has a hard time really liking anyone he meets until considerably later in the plot. He still helps people, but he’s not invested and when he lets someone die, it really clicks what that means and what he let happen and it absolutely horrifies him.

When the story demands that the big bad attacks and destroys a valley Archer does not stand for it, he takes on an entire army to protect them, combing all of his magic and power to shoot floating island fortresses out of the air even as he teleports the people to his new base, he isn’t able to save everyone, but the overwhelming majority. Then he takes the fight to the big bad and rather than following the usual storyline for the game, it becomes a war-sequence, with Archer leading a war against the villain.
Elder Scrolls Oblivion
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
He’s the prisoner, manacles welded shut on his wrists and binding them together. He gets the usual quest, but without his equipment, he’s massively weaker.

He saves Martin, but nearly loses an arm in the process. He gets bitten by a vampire early on, intercepting it when it went for Martin, assuming that as he’s already got vampire blood in him, he can’t be affected. He’s wrong, and it mixes with his burgeoning Rosario + Vampire vampirism, creating a new strain. He’s weak to holy magic, fire, sunlight, and pure water, but his strength, speed, durability, and regeneration are all increased.

When he meets up with the Blades they have the equipment he requested they pick up (which thankfully was in the chest) and he is able to get the manacles off of his wrists and into his proper armor.

While waiting for Martin to finish translating things, he ends up doing the Mages guild questline and tries to take on its villian without the grand black soul gem… but Manimarco takes control of him, surprised at the new kind of vampire and experiments on him, cutting open his mouth to examine his teeth as well as an arm, leg, and his stomach to examine his inner workings. The Archmage does come to save him with a contingent of battle-mages, and Archer can only sob in relief once he’s freed. Manimarco starts to escape. Cue True-Sight and holy sniper rifle bullets.

Archer is never again able to hold up to being paralyzed, being magically paralyzed truly unsettles him and makes him panic, scalpels also give him nightmares and make him recoil reflexively.

Archer eventually collects most of the Daedric Artifacts and progresses through the storyline. When Mehrunes Dagon appears as they rush to the temple to relight the fires, Archer creates a demiplane to pull the Daedric Prince and his armies into, however briefly, to give Martin the time to relight the fires. Once the fires are re-lit, Dagon and his armies that were dragged outside cannot cross over again… but neither can Archer. Archer allows himself to fade while flicking off Dagon with a smile.
Fallout 3 / New Vegas
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
Archer is ‘summoned’ in the Dunwich building, and makes his way across the capital wasteland. He doesn’t really have a frame of reference for the storyline, so he just wanders, picking up allies and ‘righting wrongs’ along the way. Utterly vaporizing the Slaver camp and escorting the slaves to safety… Clover insists on staying with him though. In time, he meets up with the Lone Wanderer and their dad and assists the Lone Wanderer. Eventually, Archer heads off across the country for lack of better things to do and ends up getting roped into the New Vegas storyline, something he is pointedly unfamiliar with and it shows. He has to slaughter most of an entire faction to put them down just because he was too used to knowing everything going on.

---

Not as sure about this one. I like the concept of him being thrown into the wasteland and having to deal with the fact that none of his skills and abilities prepared him to deal with radiation or the mutations that come with the Fallout universe, but I'm struggling on how to bring him in.
Minecraft
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
A lonely existence, much of Archers time here is spent trying to not go insane. With just a talking sword after so much time with companions and as part of a team, Archer is extremely lonely, and while he learns much over the (on average) three+ years he spends in this universe, the damage it does to his social skills is not worth it. He is able to escape the Minecraft universe when he, in order, saves a village from zombies, stops the Ender Dragon, and stops the Wither.
Terraria
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
Finally able to have people to talk to, Archer is more prone to physical contact every time he leaves Minecraft. He has to fight several bosses each time to 'escape', but it’s far less stressful on him than Minecraft as he has people to talk to
Xcom: Enemy Within
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
He awakens when he is released from an alien containment tank, which weirds him out a fair bit, but is inducted into Xcom at his own request.

While the absolutely minimal ambient mana means he can barely do any magic, he has more combat experience than all of the rest of Xcom combined. His greatest contribution is in the developmental departments though, easily understanding the alien technology through a combination of reference points and Structural Analysis.

He rather likes the Commander of Xcom, the old, fussy lady calling up old memories that he can barely recall, a warm reminder of grandparents that he has lost to the Kaleidoscope.

Archer is discovered to have the 'Gift', and is a very powerful user, though not the most powerful, the fact that this is different from all the other forms of magic he is aware of throws him for a loop on his understanding of physics.

Additionally, due to his enhanced durability, he acts as a testbed for many of the implants they develop. He tries to help the Volunteer by trying to figure out how to stop the ship from collapsing without sacrificing anyone, but the Volunteer doesn’t let him and kicks him off of the ship with the others. Archers body dissolves as they land after the ship explodes and he never returns to this world again, the burgeoning romance he had with a solidier forever lost.
Dungeon Keeper
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
He’s summoned by a dungeon keeper, by the point that he’s absorbed Mu, tainted with darkspawn blood, stolen the Divinity of demigods of Muder, is a vampire as well as a were-dragon, by Dungeon Keeper standards he’s the ultimate evil.

Well screw that.

He kills his supposed master and feels his 'Independant Action' kick in. He decides to study how things work here for what time he has left, but accidentally becomes a Dungeon Keeper himself, anchoring himself to this reality.

He goes with it. While he’s not the most skilled Keeper and oftentimes gets outwitted or outplayed by his fellows and hated by the civillians/”Heroes”. But the considerable personal power he has and futuristic enchanted equipment he makes for his minions means that while he’s unsubtle, he doesn’t need to be.

He creates a small kingdom on the surface and sets up trade networks. But some armies take exemption to this and mobilize against him, the first time Archer simply deflects the army with the minimum loss of life, but after the third war against his kingdom causes a loss of civilian life, Archer mobilizes the ‘flying aircraft carrier dungeon’ he’s made to hold the army of dragons he either bullied or paid to join him. He conquers an entire swath of area, setting up dungeon hearts to properly spread his power. He does his best to minimize casualties and avoids civilian casualties like the plague and intended to stop after his retribution against the country that harmed his people… but it still unites the entire rest of the world against him, the Dungeon Keepers doing their best to ensure he fails in various ways.

One of Archer’s Dungeon Hearts is destroyed and he dissipates. When he comes back, he leads his armies to conquer the entire continent, facing off against the Avatar of Good himself and winning. Archer has to adjust to having outright minions as well as people to dedicate to research, but also to the fact that everyone’s trying to backstab him (at least initially). Also, while Archer is loathed by the upper echelons for his ‘evil’ and ‘bucking of tradition’ and ‘weakness’ and ‘goodness’ dependingon who you ask, the people he rules almost universally love him due to his determination to cause a magi-industrial revolution and educate the masses.
Warhammer 40k
Brainstorming of Events
Spoiler for Hidden:
Archer is summoned by Cultists moments before the Inquisition arrives, while he initially stops the inquisition from slaughtering them because he’s confused what’s going on, but once it’s explained (and how he was summoned), Archer slaughters his summoners himself.

He gets roped into helping the Inquisition stopping a warp rift that a Chaos Marine has done under the cover of Archer being summoned. Because of his nature and the many holy weapons he wields, Archer is particularly useful against the demons. The Inquisitor is a Radical and due to Archer’s apparent honesty, power, and willingness to listen to orders, ropes him into her entourage.

As Dragon Age Origins magic is apparently Psyker powers (an assumption for the ease of continuity), Archer comes across as a short, corrupted, Psker Tech Marine, which makes pretty much everybody other than the Inquisitor herself really uncomfortable, and he doesn’t blame them.

Ine one mission, Archer gets his leg blown off just above the knee by a landmine and is unable to regenerate it for an unknown reason, the Deathwatch Astartes in the group carries him until the end of the mission at which point he gets a cybernetic replacement.

After several years of working with the Inquisitor, they make an assault on a Chaos Marine and accompanying Cult trying to take over a relatively backwater planet, and Archer gets caught in the blast radius of a Vortex Grenade that he pushed the Inquisitor away from, this does serious damage to him and vaporizes his arm. The only reason he isn’t dead is due to the relatively immense Warp resistance he has from all of his apparent corruption. He limps along after the group to finish the mission, but isn’t very helpful aside from providing holy support fire. He gets a replacement bionic arm after the mission as well as replacement ribs on his left side.

Unknown to Archer, the Inquisitor has been using these 'repairs' and any surgery Archer has to undergo as opportunities to ‘upgrade’ him with Astartes organs she has gained through various means, some tainted, some not, all from wildly different chapters, some even experimental organs.

When he figures this out, Archer is beyond pissed but suppresses his automatic reaction and goes to talk to the Deathwatch Astartes about his concerns, mostly that she’s going too far and being too risky with this. The Astartes tells him that there’s nothing that Archer can do, though the Astartes bristles that Archer has ‘holy Astartes geneseed’ within him, the Astartes knows Archer well enough by this point to know that he didn’t ask for this, the Inquisitor forced it on him.

Archer tries to figure out wtf to do… only to have the group accosted by a Deathwatch squad not much later as another, far less radical Inquisitor executes judgement on the extremely radical one that they’ve followed. Archer's concerns where the straw that broke the camels back for their Astartes and he'd called in the Inquisition.

Several members of the entourage are killed, and they almost execute Archer as well, but the Astartes they’ve traveled with vouches for him enough that they’re willing to give him a pseudo-chance.

Archer is forced into extensive testing and basically torture to ensure that he’s ‘pure in spirit, if not in body’ as the Astartes says. After years of this torture as well as hypnoidoctrination, Archer is released into another Inquisitors entourage with a Deathwatch Marine.

He’s changed by this torture. After several relatively innocuous missions (Where Archer’s changed nature shows up in his ignoring of the suffering of others and far greater willingness to kill the heretic first rather than try to save them. He follows his Inquisitor on another mission… which turns into a royal clusterfuck.

Tyranids, tyranids everywhere.

After a year of attempting to save the planet under orders, the Inquisitor begins to consider declaring Exterminatus… and a spark of his determination to save innocents relights within him and Archer takes a ship out to meet the Tyranid fleet. Tapping into the power he’s been denied due to the conditioning and torture, Archer is no stranger to the ‘Hunger’, and if anything, is empowered by it through Mu and his own hungers. Bioship by bioship, Archer begins to take the Tyranid fleet apart, either by detonating their fuel or hijacking the primary brain of the ship and guiding it into another. Archer makes sure to take out the ships that allow for transport between star systems and as he is wore down and wounded, he guides the largest ships he can down onto the largest concentration of Tyranids on the surface of the planet as a colony-drop. Archer re-enters the atmosphere on his own, heavily wounded by simple attrition. He attempts to take down more of the Tyranids, but the Inquisitor forces him to stop and has him put into a medical coma against his will to save his life as he's done enough. It is after this point that he, while heavily wounded, mentally fades from this world.



Summary of Events
A 'Swing' is a list of universes starting with F/SN until he returns to F/SN. Currently this is just a list of the universes in order, summaries will be added later.

First Swing
Spoiler for Hidden:
F/SN

Baldur's Gate (Faueron)

Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic
Second Swing
Spoiler for Hidden:
F/SN

Baldur's Gate (Faueron)

Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic

Monster Rancher

Rosario + Vampire
Third Swing
Spoiler for Hidden:
F/SN

Baldur's Gate (Faueron)

Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic

Monster Rancher

Rosario + Vampire

Familiar of Zero

Dog Days
Fourth Swing
Spoiler for Hidden:
F/SN

Baldur's Gate (Faueron)

Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic

Monster Rancher

Rosario + Vampire

Familiar of Zero

Dog Days

Dragon Age Origins

Mass Effect
Fifth Swing
Spoiler for Hidden:
F/SN

Baldur's Gate (Faueron)

Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic

Monster Rancher

Rosario + Vampire

Familiar of Zero

Dog Days

Dragon Age Origins

Mass Effect

Kingdoms of Amalur

Divinity 2 (Ego Draconis)
Sixth Swing
Spoiler for Hidden:
F/SN

Baldur's Gate (Faueron)

Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic

Monster Rancher

Rosario + Vampire

Familiar of Zero

Dog Days

Dragon Age Origins

Mass Effect

Kingdoms of Amalur

Divinity 2 (Ego Draconis)

Elder Scrolls Oblivion

Fallout 3
Seventh Swing
Spoiler for Hidden:
F/SN

Baldur's Gate (Faueron)

Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic

Monster Rancher

Rosario + Vampire

Familiar of Zero

Dog Days

Dragon Age Origins

Mass Effect

Kingdoms of Amalur

Divinity 2 (Ego Draconis)

Elder Scrolls Oblivion

Fallout 3

Minecraft

Terraria
Eighth Swing
Spoiler for Hidden:
F/SN

Baldur's Gate (Faueron)

Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic

Monster Rancher

Rosario + Vampire

Familiar of Zero

Dog Days

Dragon Age Origins

Mass Effect

Kingdoms of Amalur

Divinity 2 (Ego Draconis)

Elder Scrolls Oblivion

Fallout 3

Minecraft

Terraria

Xcom

Dungeon Keeper
Ninth Swing
Spoiler for Hidden:
F/SN

Baldur's Gate (Faueron)

Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic

Monster Rancher

Rosario + Vampire

Familiar of Zero

Dog Days

Dragon Age Origins

Mass Effect

Kingdoms of Amalur

Divinity 2 (Ego Draconis)

Elder Scrolls Oblivion

Fallout 3

Minecraft

Terraria

Xcom

Dungeon Keeper

Warhammer 40k
Tenth Swing
Spoiler for Hidden:
F/SN

Baldur's Gate (Faueron)

Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic

Monster Rancher

Rosario + Vampire

Familiar of Zero

Dog Days

Dragon Age Origins

Mass Effect

Kingdoms of Amalur

Divinity 2 (Ego Draconis)

Elder Scrolls Oblivion

Fallout 3

Minecraft

Terraria

Xcom

Dungeon Keeper

Warhammer 40k

F/SN

End of Story



Notes
I consistently refer to the SI OC in third person, because A). It makes it easier for me to treat him as a character rather than a SUPER PRECIOUS ULTRA SPESHUL TOTALLY ORIGINAL OC DONT STEAL and B). Seriously, put me through even a fraction of these events and I wouldn't really be 'myself' anymore. The character starts off as an SI, but rather quickly becomes a separate person and I need to remember this.

The SI OC should not, and can not fix everything. This should not be a 'fix fic' for any of the universes/series. He fixes what he can, but he's not perfect, not competent enough, doesn't have enough information, and in some cases, what qualifies as 'fixing' is contentious.

There is little to no obvious connection between realities, his appearance within them, his relation to the storyline, or overriding theme to his travels. This is intentional, as it leaves the SI in the dark and confuses the hell out of him.

While initially, the drama of the story will be more about survival, the loss of identity, and wtf is going on, as the SI gains power and skill, it will gradually change to the moral implications of his growing power, the struggle of maintaining identity in the face of terrible, subversive instincts, and the consequences of his actions. The threat of death never leaves entirely however, because no matter how powerful he becomes, a single luck shot can still take him out (and I fully intend for this to happen at least a few times).

Cherry Lover

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Re: Adrift in the Kaleidoscope (Brainstorming / Summary / Criticism Thread)
« Reply #1 on: February 27, 2014, 10:21:45 PM »
Hmm, OK, I think there are too many universes in here, honestly. No-one is going to be able to follow all of the different cross-over universes as it stands.

Other than that, it's difficult for me to give much of an opinion here, because there is not much information about the FSN aspect. The concept seems OK, but I think it will be difficult to keep readers interested through such a wide range of different universes.

Andoriol

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Re: Adrift in the Kaleidoscope (Brainstorming / Summary / Criticism Thread)
« Reply #2 on: February 27, 2014, 11:09:09 PM »
Yeah, I've gotten that complaint elsewhere as well. Do you have any suggestions about which ones to remove?

And currently, I'm trying to figure out the following:

Dragon Age: Lyrium - How does this interact with the Nasuverse?

F/SN - Trying to figure out how Magic Circuits work in practice so I know how to describe it from the SIOC's point of view.

Cherry Lover

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Re: Adrift in the Kaleidoscope (Brainstorming / Summary / Criticism Thread)
« Reply #3 on: February 27, 2014, 11:58:39 PM »
Yeah, I've gotten that complaint elsewhere as well. Do you have any suggestions about which ones to remove?

Not really, to be honest. I don't know anything much about any of them.

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And currently, I'm trying to figure out the following:

Dragon Age: Lyrium - How does this interact with the Nasuverse?

Don't know anything about that, sorry.

Quote
F/SN - Trying to figure out how Magic Circuits work in practice so I know how to describe it from the SIOC's point of view.

What do you mean by "how they work"?

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Re: Adrift in the Kaleidoscope (Brainstorming / Summary / Criticism Thread)
« Reply #4 on: February 28, 2014, 02:12:28 AM »
Yeah, I've gotten that complaint elsewhere as well. Do you have any suggestions about which ones to remove?

Not really, to be honest. I don't know anything much about any of them.

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And currently, I'm trying to figure out the following:

Dragon Age: Lyrium - How does this interact with the Nasuverse?

Don't know anything about that, sorry.
Totally okay!

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F/SN - Trying to figure out how Magic Circuits work in practice so I know how to describe it from the SIOC's point of view.

What do you mean by "how they work"?
Do you have a small amount of prana stored in them and then use that to draw in/manipulate the surrounding mana? Do you have them full of a (relatively) large amount of prana and use it up like classic MP to cast things by hooking up with the Supreme Reality Marble of Gaia? I know they heat up through use because of inefficiencies, but I don't really have a full understanding how they work from a first person perspective since Shirou uses them incorrectly for most of F/SN. Does that make more sense?

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Re: Adrift in the Kaleidoscope (Brainstorming / Summary / Criticism Thread)
« Reply #5 on: February 28, 2014, 02:35:29 AM »
Hmm, well, magi can use both internal and external supplies of prana. I think their circuits do fill up with reasonable amounts, but bigger spells will only use their internal prana to get things going, and will then draw mana from the environment.

However, magi do still need to run any spells they cast through their circuits (as evidenced by Rin's limits with the Jewelled Sword), so the instantaneous prana output of a spell is limited by their circuit capacity.

Andoriol

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Re: Adrift in the Kaleidoscope (Brainstorming / Summary / Criticism Thread)
« Reply #6 on: February 28, 2014, 02:40:27 AM »
Hm, okay, totally forgot about that with the Jeweled Sword...

How hard/difficult do you think it is for a mangus to link up to external prana? First impulse is requiring something like a magic circle to do that.

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Re: Adrift in the Kaleidoscope (Brainstorming / Summary / Criticism Thread)
« Reply #7 on: February 28, 2014, 01:41:24 PM »
I think it's pretty easy. Any half-decent magus will use mana for any lengthy spell, and I don't think they need a circle or anything like that. Magic circles just make it more efficient, I think.

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Okay, here's an attempt at summaries of the first few universes and chapters, very rough draft but up for criticism:



Through a completely unknown method, ‘Archer’ / OCdoriol is sent hurtling through the kaleidoscope. A relatively normal person who for no discernable reason, is thrown into the space between realities. He’s trapped somewhere similar to the Throne of Heroes in ‘location’ (as much as the word can mean something in this sense) but distinctly not. Then he feels… pulled. Like his heart and core have been roped and tugged along… and then poured, as if painlessly melted down and dribbling into a container.

And then there’s pressure against his skin that something inside of him rises to match it- and suddenly face meets couch and floor and there’s the snapping of bones and pain.

First Swing
Spoiler for Hidden:
Spoiler for "Servant" Stats (Pffffffffffffffffffft):
Class: Archer
Alignment: Lawful Good
True Name: *****
Sex: Male

Parameters:
Strength: F
Endurance: F
Agility: F
Mana: N/A
Luck: C
Noble Phantasm: N/A

Class Abilities:[/u]
Independent Action: E
Materialization for 30 turns.

Personal Skills:[/u]
Impossible Knowledge: C+
Archer has knowledge from the depths of the Kaleidoscope and alternate realities. He is aware of things which he would otherwise unable to know. Due to his nature, Archer is also resistant to any effect which would expose him to the overwhelming amounts of information.

Noble Phantasms:[/u]
N/A
F/SN –
Summoned by Tohsaka Rin as ‘Archer’, he crashes into the floor hard, breaking an arm. Rin rushes up to see wtf is going on. ‘Archer’ has a small panic attack. Rin has to use Hypnosis to calm him down and get the full story from him, what little there is.

Rin gives him a bit as she mulls over the information, as rambling as it is, that he can give her. She decides to lock him up in a Bounded Field for a bit while she confirms some things as best she can. Particularly, she figures out that Shirou is essentially exactly as described.

?? Rin uses ‘Archer’ as an info-well, the poor sod starting to relax and snark some at her but genuinely concerned and out of his depth. He has relatively complete knowledge of Fate and UBW, but only general knowledge of Heavens Feel. He warns her about this.

?? Wtf does Rin do with this info???

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First Concept – Rin ropes Shirou and a properly summoned Saber into an alliance because ‘Archer’, no matter how you look at it, is an absolute shit Servant at best.

Rin tests ‘Archer’ repeatedly to be sure that A). He’s not screwing with her and B). He really doesn’t have anything else useful other than information. But at the same time, she’s not harsh, she’s too good natured and he’s too damn vulnerable and pathetic.

Rin convinces Lancer to help her and Saber take on Caster (letting him operate under the assumption that Rin is Saber’s master?)

This works and Saber brings down Caster (avoiding Rule Breaker as Rin had been warned and thus, warned Saber).

Berserker attacks them and Rin / Saber are forced to retreat.

Blood Fort Andromeda becomes a problem. Rin tries to have Saber kill Shinji but Shirou will have none of it. They resolve the problem as per Fate.

Not much later, Lancer breaks into the Tohsaka residence using his runes to try and track down the seventh Servant, and finds ‘Archer’. “… well shit.”

Lancer used Stab! It’s Super Effective!

Result: ‘Archer’ dies horribly, the curse of Gae Bolg imprints itself on his soul and he always has a scar on his chest on both sides of him, on top of an already existent scar.


Baldur's Gate (D&D)
Archer is summoned by a wizard main character of the series into the middle of the battle. He is wounded, but helps, barely, against pathetic enemies.

The series is a classic Dungeons and Dragons fantasy universe, with gods and dragons and monsters, with adventurers and kings. The protagonist of this story is (unknowingly) a demigod of the dead god of murder, who’s foster father was just killed. She is now on a quest to figure out wtf happened with her companions. Archer has been summoned into nearly the very beginning of the series, with the protagonist and most of the party being Level 1 – 3.

He doesn’t speak the language, but with some effort, they get him magic to do so. He explains his situation to them, and while some members of the party are unsympathetic, most are. The protagonist vows to help Archer as best she can. They help him get equipped with leather, a spear, a shield, and start teaching him magic.

Archer doesn’t remember his own name, which horrifies him. For the most part he’s able to deal with it, but he has a breakdown and needs to calm down occasionally. It’s all just too overwhelming and terrifying.

Much of the time is spent either training (glossed over in the story as it’s not interesting to read about, just snippets to show his difficulties) as well as having to deal with a medieval level of technology and adventuring on top of that.

He’s wounded several times while sticking close to them. A wolf bite to the leg, arrows to the shoulders and body, and countless bruises. But he survives several quests and learns the basics of magic.

After ~two months his summoning runs out at an inconvenient point(?)

Result: A bit more character development, some time to breathe, trials, tribulations, and showing that hey, he doesn’t have to die to go on.


Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic[/b]
His soul replaces the artificial personality of Revan. Surprised, he rolls with it as best he can, having adjusted at least a bit in the previous world.

He barely gets any distance in the game before taking a blaster bolt to the face through sheer, dumb lack of luck.

Result: Death. Quick thankfully, but Death. Loses = Memories of his Grandparents ; Reset to what he was like at the end of Baldur’s Gate. Demonstrates a complete lack of plot-armor.

Cherry Lover

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Hmm, OK, that looks reasonable, although I'm not entirely sure how Rin would act in this situation. She does have pride, after all, and she wants to win the war not just hand it to Shirou.

How much knowledge does your OC have of HF? If he knows of Sakura's situation at all then I would expect Rin to act on that information.

Andoriol

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Re: Adrift in the Kaleidoscope (Brainstorming / Summary / Criticism Thread)
« Reply #10 on: March 05, 2014, 11:57:52 PM »
Who said she'd hand over her wish to Shirou? She convinced Shirou to hand his over to her~ (More seriously, given the insight OCdoriol has on Shirou's personality, I feel it's likely she'd try to swing that and that it would actually go down that way).

But the only information he has is that Sakura's situation is horrendous, there's the penis-worms, the repeated rape, and that she's actually an alternate Lesser Grail that can channel ALL THE EVILS OF THE WORLD, which is really bad. But that about sums it up. He's not even actively aware of the Shadow, True Assassin, or really any of the plot points. He'd be aware of them if mentioned, but not able to call up the info on his own.

And yeah, Rin would do something, but I have no clue what. At all. I don't have enough of a bead on her personality and she's definitely smarter than I am.

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Re: Adrift in the Kaleidoscope (Brainstorming / Summary / Criticism Thread)
« Reply #11 on: March 06, 2014, 12:04:50 AM »
Who said she'd hand over her wish to Shirou? She convinced Shirou to hand his over to her~ (More seriously, given the insight OCdoriol has on Shirou's personality, I feel it's likely she'd try to swing that and that it would actually go down that way).

It's not really about the wish, though. Rin admits that she has no real idea what she would use the Grail for, and Tokiomi never really taught her enough for her to be aware of the real purpose behind the wars so she doesn't know she's meant to be aiming to reach Akasha. Rin wants to win, because Tokiomi told her that winning the Grail was her "duty". If Shirou just does everything for her and then hands her the Grail at the end I'm not sure if that would really count.

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But the only information he has is that Sakura's situation is horrendous, there's the penis-worms, the repeated rape, and that she's actually an alternate Lesser Grail that can channel ALL THE EVILS OF THE WORLD, which is really bad. But that about sums it up. He's not even actively aware of the Shadow, True Assassin, or really any of the plot points. He'd be aware of them if mentioned, but not able to call up the info on his own.

Honestly, that's worse, because Rin's response to that would probably be to get Sakura out of the house ASAP and then flatten it. Which would probably not end well....

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And yeah, Rin would do something, but I have no clue what. At all. I don't have enough of a bead on her personality and she's definitely smarter than I am.

She is, but she's also working on incomplete information, which would probably cause her to act a bit rashly. She knows Sakura is being constantly tortured but not that Zouken has worms inside her he can use to control her, so the obvious move is to free Sakura as soon as she possibly can to prevent her suffering any further. And to kill Shinji slowly....

I guess the question is how much her "honour" as a magus would prevent her just taking Zouken out immediately. I'm going to guess that it wouldn't have much effect, though, not if she knew Sakura could be being raped by penis worms at that very moment....
« Last Edit: March 06, 2014, 12:08:21 AM by Cherry Lover »

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Re: Adrift in the Kaleidoscope (Brainstorming / Summary / Criticism Thread)
« Reply #12 on: March 06, 2014, 12:17:25 AM »
It's not really about the wish, though. Rin admits that she has no real idea what she would use the Grail for, and Tokiomi never really taught her enough for her to be aware of the real purpose behind the wars so she doesn't know she's meant to be aiming to reach Akasha. Rin wants to win, because Tokiomi told her that winning the Grail was her "duty". If Shirou just does everything for her and then hands her the Grail at the end I'm not sure if that would really count.
Urgh, true. That's a problem. I have a feeling she'd be more pragmatic about it though, especially considering that her Servant has no combat capabilities whatsoever. How else can she approach the war aside from making Shirou (and thus, Saber) her subordinates?

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But the only information he has is that Sakura's situation is horrendous, there's the penis-worms, the repeated rape, and that she's actually an alternate Lesser Grail that can channel ALL THE EVILS OF THE WORLD, which is really bad. But that about sums it up. He's not even actively aware of the Shadow, True Assassin, or really any of the plot points. He'd be aware of them if mentioned, but not able to call up the info on his own.

Honestly, that's worse, because Rin's response to that would probably be to get Sakura out of the house ASAP and then flatten it. Which would probably not end well....

Quote
And yeah, Rin would do something, but I have no clue what. At all. I don't have enough of a bead on her personality and she's definitely smarter than I am.

She is, but she's also working on incomplete information, which would probably cause her to act a bit rashly. She knows Sakura is being constantly tortured but not that Zouken has worms inside her he can use to control her, so the obvious move is to free Sakura as soon as she possibly can to prevent her suffering any further. And to kill Shinji slowly....

I guess the question is how much her "honour" as a magus would prevent her just taking Zouken out immediately. I'm going to guess that it wouldn't have much effect, though, not if she knew Sakura could be being raped by penis worms at that very moment....
True, but I really have no clue here one way or the other, nor how she would accomplish that, and again, I haven't gotten through HF myself so I don't know how Zouken would affect things or how Sakura would.

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Re: Adrift in the Kaleidoscope (Brainstorming / Summary / Criticism Thread)
« Reply #13 on: March 06, 2014, 12:29:02 AM »
Urgh, true. That's a problem. I have a feeling she'd be more pragmatic about it though, especially considering that her Servant has no combat capabilities whatsoever. How else can she approach the war aside from making Shirou (and thus, Saber) her subordinates?

Hmm, yeah, perhaps. I guess she has little real alternative.

I'm not sure how she'd handle Saber, though. Saber is Shirou's servant, not Rin's, and she actually does want the Grail, so she will not accept just handing it to Rin and Archer.

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True, but I really have no clue here one way or the other, nor how she would accomplish that, and again, I haven't gotten through HF myself so I don't know how Zouken would affect things or how Sakura would.

Well, Zouken would be a big problem due to the control he has over Sakura, but Rin wouldn't know that until after she'd dragged Sakura out of the house. As for Sakura herself, I get the impression that she would probably feel happy that her sister had come to rescue her, although she may well be somewhat distrustful of her motives.

And, honestly, not playing HF is going to be a problem for you writing this fic in general. It's almost impossible to characterise Rider, Sakura etc. properly without it, and even Rin is difficult.

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Re: Adrift in the Kaleidoscope (Brainstorming / Summary / Criticism Thread)
« Reply #14 on: March 06, 2014, 12:41:03 AM »
Urgh, true. That's a problem. I have a feeling she'd be more pragmatic about it though, especially considering that her Servant has no combat capabilities whatsoever. How else can she approach the war aside from making Shirou (and thus, Saber) her subordinates?

Hmm, yeah, perhaps. I guess she has little real alternative.

I'm not sure how she'd handle Saber, though. Saber is Shirou's servant, not Rin's, and she actually does want the Grail, so she will not accept just handing it to Rin and Archer.
Yeah, that's problematic, as 'Archer' would want the grail as well to just go fucking home... but I think he could be convinced to let Saber have it since A). His soul wouldn't help fill the grail and he really wouldn't need to die B). HIs prana cost would be piddly even without the Greater Grail System and C). Rin might be able to help get him home afterwards even without the Grail.

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Well, Zouken would be a big problem due to the control he has over Sakura, but Rin wouldn't know that until after she'd dragged Sakura out of the house. As for Sakura herself, I get the impression that she would probably feel happy that her sister had come to rescue her, although she may well be somewhat distrustful of her motives.

And, honestly, not playing HF is going to be a problem for you writing this fic in general. It's almost impossible to characterise Rider, Sakura etc. properly without it, and even Rin is difficult.
I'm aware, I'm trying to fix that by working my way through it, but I don't have as much time off as I'd like to do so.